Archive for March, 2009

 

Last night, I slept earlier than usual. Unfortunately, I woke up in the middle of the night with a troubled heart. I don’t know what exactly disquieted me. I just knew that peace had left me and that I wasn’t all right. 

I switched on the lamp near the bed while hearing my dog breathe. He too, like me, was not asleep anymore. There was a stack of books on the table but I reached out for a book that was already in my bed. It was a KJV Bible that a friend of mine gave me. Something led me to Psalm 91. Here are the verses that moved me:   

Psalm 91:5 Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day; Psalm 91:9 Because thou hast made the LORD, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation;

The terror by night woke me up but it can never rob me of my real Peace who is Jesus. In the same way, trials may come and failures may abound in my life but these can never stop me from running to Him who gives joy, protection and deliverance. The good thing is He always comes to the rescue no matter how undeserving I feel.  

Psalm 91:14-15 says: Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him. 

And for that, I thank and praise Him. 

He that by faith chooses God for his protector, shall find all in him that he needs or can desire. Great security is promised to believers in the midst of danger. Wisdom shall keep them from being afraid without cause, and faith shall keep them from being unduly afraid. Whatever is done, our heavenly Father’s will is done; and we have no reason to fear.

(Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary on Psalm 91)

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Imagine having a hungry stomach with only one piece of cookie left. Would you be willing to give the last piece to a hungry woman? No, this is not about Fita’s advertisement. How about if you have all the 9 pieces of biscuits and someone is begging you for the whole pack? Would you give everything despite the fact that you’re hearing your bowel sounds even without the help of a stethoscope?
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I know it’s hard to give something so valuable when you most need it. Yes, there are times when giving is so easy. Example is when we give away things that we do not need anymore thus giving birth to the saying “Someone’s garbage is someone else’s treasure”. We also believe in the saying “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and so we give away things that are not anymore desirable to us. The point is, it’s easy to give when we feel that we’re not losing anything.
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But what if a person is asking for that newly bought Dell Inspiron? It’s functional, brand-new and perfectly colored!

 You bought it for yourself after saving for a year and now this person who is asking you for this Dell portable happens to be your favorite brother. After contemplating, you give in because you love him and you trust him that 
he will indeed take good care of it. You might even get to borrow it from him!
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So years after, you finally bought another gadget. 
It’s the MacBook Air that you have been dreaming about since time immemorial. Now, someone comes to you and tells you that he wants that from you. This person happens to be an enemy! You know that this person also has a reputation of being reckless or foolhardy. Too bad, this one and only MacBook Air of yours would just end up in the garbage bin after a few months or so. This person will definitely not value this precious possession of yours. BUT there is something that keeps on knocking deep inside you. It’s the fact that you love that person, without conditions. So you give away your precious Mac notebook. Love made a way! Love gave away! Sounds too good to be true, right? 
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This situation reminds me of my Heavenly Father who gave His all for us. He had a Son, named Jesus, and He was His one and only. He knew from the very start that He will be giving Him up to a world that is characterized by careless unconcern. I am part of that world that He loved without any limits or conditions. So I am just going to speak for myself.
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I know well that I have been a sinner from the very start. I haven’t been the princess that He hoped I would be. I loved playing with fire which burned not only my fingers but also his heart. I hurt Him without any doubt. Yet, His Word tells me that He knew me even when I was still in my mother’s 

womb. This reminds me that He knew all along that I was going to go against Him sooner than anyone could ever expect. I was a slave to sin who didn’t know that I was already bought with a price to be free. If I already knew about it, my heart just didn’t believe and receive a gift that sounded too good to be true.
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I lived a life of a slave, ate a pig’s feed
 and slept with a pillow made of rock. I chose those things for myself by simply going against Him. I loved my ways and hated His. He knew all those things well and it made Him bleed. It made Him send His Son to save me. Was it easy for the Father? Was it easy for Jesus?
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Just imagine giving up that cookie, that Dell laptop, that MacBook Air, that very life of yours to a criminal. Would that be easy? NO! But what could be the only reason for you to just give in? The reason is LOVE. Nothing less.
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For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
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So, this is what we are called for. One verb to summarize our purpose– to LOVE. 
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Difficult? YES. Impossible? NO.
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One verb to summarize His will for us– to be LOVED.
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The purpose of this article is to remind myself of what God has done for me. I knew it even before I came to know Him personally but I was too calloused to care. Even now, I sometimes get insensitive to His call to be like Him. Everytime I forget this truth, I would feel dead, when I should be feeling alive for all that He has already done for me two thousand years ago.

Finally, I wish to share about the depth of His love for us. It is so great that we can never imagine any other reason for His surrender to us. Only love could make it so tangible and real. Only love could make a way. 

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It has been a long time since I last wrote a poem. Maybe that was years ago when I was still in elementary. So I am composing one now and needless to say…. it’s like one of those poems made by grade 4 students. No fancy words here… only a heart that longs to glorify one person who loved me so much.

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A faith that fades and disappears

A love that is not sharp enough to pierce

A life that is here today and gone tomorrow

A heart that experiences sorrow

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Those lines describe eveything that I possess

I have nothing to boast if you care to reassess

This world is temporary and so am I

Let me emphasize that one day I’ll also die

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What is my point in this composition?

It is to remind me of my real position

Before the Lord, I am nothing but dust

Like a cheap iron, I am bound to rust

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But He came to my life and reminded me

I love you Jessica, I love you dearly

Who am I Lord that you care to speak to me?

Jessica, I am your Creator. I will set you free

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Here I am still as vulnerable as I can be

I have no one else to give me security

I only have Christ to assure me everyday

That His love for me will last for eternity

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So I thank You with all of my heart, mind and might

I long to one day join You when the time is right

I am the worst of all sinners yet you cared to see

The beauty that you crafted especially for me

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Let me end this by saying I LOVE YOU TOO

I am not poetic but that is true!

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